At some point in the last couple of years, I picked up this little book.
Generally, I’m a fast reader, but this one took me some time. I had to digest some parts more than others. It’s a book about integrity. While I consider myself a person with reasonably good integrity, there was something that challenged me here. Something that make me think and wonder and question.
Greer says that integrity is “being true to the lives to which we have been called” (p. xi). To be true to that, I have to first know what I have been called to. For me, I have several callings on my life. Wife, mother, pastor. Each of those callings happens within the relationship I have with God through Jesus Christ.
But how do I live a life worthy of the calling that I have received?
Well, that’s the integrity part. It’s being who God has called me to be, in the best way that I can, honoring God with all I have, all I am and all I try to be. It’s being the me God has designed me to be, even when that doesn’t meet the expectations of others. It’s being the me God has designed me to be, even when I’m afraid I don’t have enough courage. It’s being the me God has designed me to be, even though I’m not sure what the point is.
Lately, I feel God stirring something in my soul, but I’m not sure I have enough courage. Lately, I’ve been feeling something on the horizon, but I’m not sure I’m bold enough. I’m not sure I have enough patience or compassion or – please God let me have enough humility.
Perhaps, even though I’ve had this book on my shelf for some time, I’m reading it now “for such a time as this.”
I therefore, the prisoner in the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:1-3, NRSV)